So I was doing my “poopy dance”, as Dad calls it, and he noticed, and told me to “go poopy in the potty”. Now I know better than to poopy on the floor or in the bed, and I hold it as long as I can in my diaper, but why would I want to poopy in the potty? But I did what I was told, and went and sat on the potty. I must have been there forever (dad edit: 5 minutes) before dad comes in and gave me a cookie. I don’t like sitting on the potty too long, but Dad said I could eat cookies as long as I sat on the potty. We made peanut butter cookies earlier and I already had eaten 2, and knew they were nummy. So I didn’t mind sitting as long as I got to eat them. I sat there and ate cookies and cookies and cookies, almost as many as when I steal the whole bag and go to the closet to eat them! I ate 7 more cookies before the strangest thing happened. The poopies went down into the potty! Dad went beserk, hugging me and clapping and telling me what a good girl I was. He made me look in the potty and then wash my hands and put my special potty away. I can’t believe my Daddy lied to me; I wasn’t done eating cookies and he told me I could sit there until I was done! Then another strange thing happened. My tummy started hurting, bad! So I went to my bed and laid down and whined a bit, telling Daddy my tummy hurt. Dad told me to just tell the whole world how horrible life was and how bad a daddy he was, and I thought I heard sarcasm in his voice, but I did what he said anyway and came and wrote for you all to read!