Saturday I was given the opportunity to add another thing to my list of ‘things never to do again’
I’d like to say this goes right above ‘Peeing on an electrical fence’
Since we got the girls our lives have been running at full speed. Sarah wakes up in the morning and gets the girls ready and takes them to school. I get up and goto school, goto work, go home and do homework, Sarah gets off work and picks up the girls and comes home. I do ‘distract the kids’ while Sarah cooks, Sarah cooks, and I do bath and bedtime. Sarah and I get about an hour of exhausted talk about how we are going to join a kool-aid drinking cult… and wondering how the human race has continued on without killing off their offspring… and then Sarah goes to bed and I get back on doing homework. I finish up about midnight to 1 AM and then goto bed to do it all over again. I don’t say this for you pity, but merely for you to understand that life is VERY busy for us, and neither of us really ever get a break.
Friday night I suggested to Sarah that she could go have some girl time and hang out with a friend, and I would watch their kids and our kids until they got back. Sarah kind of laughed and told me that it wouldn’t be fair, but thanked me for the offer. I could tell she wanted to, so I texted her friend and arranged the whole thing. The next morning, I told sarah about an hour before her friend was to arrive that I would be watching the kids and Sarah could goto town and do whatever she wanted. She hugged me and I was hero of the morning :-). (I always like being the hero). She gets dressed and her friend drops off their 3 boys. So let me do some math for you:
4 boys: (26, 4, 3, and 2)
2 girls: (2, and 1)
About two hours into this experience I was like.. who is the responsible adult here?!! Who is running this show! and I realized… that it was supposed to be me. 🙁
I realize now that I desperately need a 4 year old. Her oldest was amazingly helpful. I would tell him to watch the baby for me while I went to the restroom.. and he seriously gave me updates every 5 seconds about what that baby was doing. “She getting up… she’s putting something in her mouth”… “Okay I took it away from her”..
Another funny thing was that our 1 year old would follow at her pace behind the other 4. So all 4 would go running down the hall and then the baby would crawl after them. ABout the time that the baby got to where they were… the rest of them came running by her in the opposite direction. Did she cry? Nope.. She just looked up at me with those brown, knowing eyes and said “Slow and steady wins the race…” Or it could have been: “Hey, Taxi, what’s wrong with you… pick me up and follow those kids!” I always get those two confused…
So after 3 hours I decided we needed a snack.. and a little nap.. So when I woke up an hour later the kids were still running around and the house was on fire! Just kidding :-). So I gave them all PB & J and laid them down in each room. One was in my bed, Our oldest was in her bed, The baby was asleep in the computer room, and the middle child of their family was in the bed in the computer room, and their youngest was on the couch in the living room. I walked into the kitchen and waited for all the screaming to stop… I gave a big sigh of relief and decided to go have some me time.. until I realized that EVERY room in the house had a kid in it.. and there was nowhere I could go. *sigh*
I broke out my new blue tooth and called some friends.. walked around the kitchen and stepped outside for some fresh air. I changed about 5 diapers.. which is much better than 20… and when the womenfolk got home.. I pretended it was the easiest thing I’d ever done..
I was able to come out of it with my sanity in tact, but I was probably about an hour away from becoming a super villain!
Phew! close call.. I’d probably look horrible in a helmet with big antlers!